Every year on New Year's Eve, I write New Year's Resolutions (if you know me, I'm sure you're not surprised I do that). I know I will be the same person at 12:01am that I am right now, but I think the process of self-reflection, recognizing flawed judgment and the willingness to improve upon myself is very important. So, even when I don't necessarily keep (or even remember) my resolutions, I still think the gesture is helpful. Besides, I am going to change anyway, so I might as well get myself on track to change for the better.
Anyway, when I sat down to write my New Year's Resolutions, I began to reflect upon this past year. All things considered, 2008 has been nothing short of an incredible year for me. God has blessed me tremendously. Of course there are some words I wish I could "un-speak", some actions I wish I could "undo" and some people I wish I could "un-meet"; however, this has been one of the best years of my life.
I changed so much in 2008 and WOW have I learned...I should be getting some sort of college credit for these lessons.
1. Everyone has their own personal "gut". Go with yours.
Never again will I allow myself to stay in a situation that I can see ending badly because someone else told me that I should "stop tripping and just see what happens". Why do I need to "see what happens" when I can tell you, in detail, exactly what is going to happen? I am no exception to general rules. Some things never, ever change and the best thing to do is to not expect them to. Don't wait until there are more red flags waving than at an Ohio State football game. Go with your gut.
2. Chemistry does not equal compatibility
Don't be surprised if you see that statement written on my forehead in permanent marker from now on. I don't know about men, but ladies, we've all been there. He's cute. He's nice. He likes you. But after the initial butterflies wear off, you realize that you have nothing, nada, zilch in common. It may be after the first hour of your second date that you (the queen of chatter) run out of things to talk about. Or maybe it's when you're watching TV and you're arguing over watching CNN or the international soccer game. Or when you're explaining for the fifth time why you can't "just hang out" with him doing nothing for an entire day. You realize that you may like each other, but you are clearly not compatible.
3. The only time love equals nothing is during a tennis game. Life is not a tennis game.
I heard that once and thought it was funny. So true though.
4. Making one mistake is not justification for making another one.
In fact, it's more of a reason not to make the same mistake the next time. What is the use of experience if I don't learn from it?
5. Female friends are a necessity
Remember when I said 2008 was the best year ever? That is with the exception of relationships. If I took this year as any indication of what my "love life" would possibly look like in the future, then excuse me while I marry my career. But one upside to the ridiculousness of men in my life this year is that I have had time to reconfigure and reprioritize the presence of females in my life -- and they are of the utmost importance. I love my friends. They understand me in ways that only another girl can. I don't have a ton of friends (no thank you), but the ones that I do have mean a lot to me. They're the ones who understand why a White Castle hamburger is significant for me hahaha. 2008 will go down as the year of friendship. I hope these girls are my friends forever.
6. The words "friend" and "soror" are not interchangeable
That's all I'm going to say about that.
7. No reason to stay is a good reason to go
I have a problem with giving up on stuff without getting what I want even if there is no rational reason for me to keep trying. I don't know if it is my inherent need to win or not wanting the time I invested to be in vain, but either way, I hate throwing in the towel. Recently I was discussing a situation with my friend and she said, "You can put a year of your life into something and get nothing out of it or put three years of your life into something and still get nothing out of it. The only thing worse than a year is a year and a day, so you might as well just walk away now." I told you I love my friends.
8. When all else fails, blame oxytocin.
This is a poor, poor excuse, but it makes me feel a lot less ridiculous.
9. Unpaid interns living in Atlanta or NYC should never, ever get a credit card
I consider myself to be fiscally disciplined. I like to shop and go out to eat, but I know that being broke isn't worth any outfit or meal. However, when it came to my summer in NYC and my fall in Atlanta, I seemed to have lost the sense that says "when you dont have a job, you shouldn't be buying anything". I racked up an incredible amount of credit card debt. If I could do it all again, I would have never signed up for the cards and instead just begged my parents for money, worked at a restaurant late at night or (here's a novel idea) told myself "no".
10. Life goes on -- and just when you think you'll never get over it, you realize that you already are.
Circumstances have a way of looming larger than life. I fall out with a friend, get my heart broken, lose sixty dollars in the mall, get fired from a newspaper, miss a phone call from an anchor at a top twenty market, get a C on a test and all of the sudden my life is over (I told you I'm intense). Time passes and I think back to that event or person and I realize that I am so over that. It's funny because I remember at the time that I thought I would never get over it. But I have and I will. I find comfort in the fact that when I'm over it, I'm over it. Life goes on.
Of course, none of these things are ground-breaking and I've learned way more than ten things this year, but this is all for now. Stay tuned for my autobiography that I will write in the next twenty-five years. I'm sure there will be a chapter entitled, "2008". It will be all about this fabulous year.
Happy New Year :)
Written 12/31/08
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